The Danielson Family

I met a missionary from South America a number of years ago in the hall at a conference.  Sadly, I can't remember his name or the South American country where he serves.  But I do remember our conversation.  It stuck with me and has served me well for a long time.

He said that all over South America churches are starting in homes as small groups.  They do it by giving a follower of Christ a Bible and a list of 5 simple questions.  Next this person is asked to invite friends and family over to read the Bible together and discuss the 5 questions.  Literally hundreds of churches are being started all over the continent every year, and thousands (if not millions) of people are coming to Christ in homes reading the Bible and talking about 5 questions.

Here's the process.

After reading a passage of Scripture together ask:
    1.  What did you like about the passage?
    2.  What did you NOT like about the passage?
    3.  What did you not understand in the passage?
    4.  What did you learn about God in the passage?
    5.  What are you going to do with what you learned?

In the Western countries we often prefer that our small group curriculum come in beautifully printed books with homework and videos taught by church celebrities...I mean "Well Known Bible Teachers". Now keep in mind that I'm one of the guys who has taught some of this high tech, well produced video curriculum, so I'm not being critical of it.  That kind of product plays a key role in our culture because it is relevent. 

What I would like to do though is this:  I challenge small group leaders everywhere to put aside the highly produced stuff every once in a while and try this simple approach.  You may find that these 5 questions become the "go to" curriculum for your small group.  You might also fall in love again with a simple "no-seminary-degree-required" approach to reading and understanding God's Word.

Good leaders listen.  They listen to those they lead.  Good leaders help those they lead listen to God's voice.  It's awesome when someone you lead hears a clear word from God and they are changed by the experience!  It's fun to celebrate with them and then challenge them to follow through on what they've heard.  It's like a drug...for the leader and the follower.

It's easy, as a leader, to get caught up helping those I lead hear from God.  The problem is that I'm often so busy helping others listen to God that I miss what He's saying to me.  Over the last week I've listened to God and I've heard Him speak to me.  His whispers are sweet and powerful and painful and...life-altering.

Let God speak to you this week.  Listen to the sweet, powerful, painful, life-altering sound of His voice...and be changed!  Don't be so busy helping others listen to God that you miss what He's saying to you!

Once in my small group ministry we had T-shirts made that were asking people if they were in a group.  The tagline "Are You In One?" was shortened and contemporized to simply say "ruIN1".  We totally missed how bad it looked unti they were printed and someone in the lobby asked "Does that say "Groups: ruin one?"

Oh Crud!  I don't have any pictures of the T-shirt because, honestly, after that lobby moment I hated those T-Shirts.

Anyway, I've said hundreds of times, "If you find the right small group, don't join it cuz you'll ruin it." I said it yesterday, in fact, and that made me think of the T-shirt.

It dawned on me that, in truth, we should all risk ruining a small group.  We all need to be in one where we risk letting down our guard, allowing people to see our "real" selves, and adding ourselves, with all our imperfections, to the flaws of a small group.  Some how in the middle of all the mess that each person brings to a group, God shows up and makes something beautiful.

So go ahead, join one, "ruIN1" and let God make beautiful stained glass out of the broken, messy pieces!

*Here's a true story (not that any of my other stories are untrue).  There was a kid I knew in grade school named Bucky.  Bucky refused to speak at school...period.  He could talk, but he simply chose not to.  I tried a thousand times to pull Bucky out of his shell but he just would not talk.  If I had a $100 bill to offer him I'm pretty sure he still wouldn't have said a word.

There was another kid I knew named Shane.  Shane rode the bus with Bucky and one day told me that every day Bucky talked on the bus.  WHAT?!?!?  I was blown away!  I didn't understand anything about personality types or group dynamics as a kid, so back then I couldn't come up with a decent guess as to why Bucky wouldn't talk at school, but would talk on the bus.

So here are some theories I've developed over the years that might explain Bucky's unusual behavior:
1.  Bucky was a psychotic serial killer in the making and today he's the inspiration for the Showtime series, "Dexter".
2.  Bucky was passionate about the color yellow so the yellow bus would pull him out of his silence.
3.  Bucky was super-introverted and wouldn't talk unless the group he was with was small enough to make him comfortable.

There may be another explanation of Bucky's behavior, but I think the last one at least holds some merit because so many people dread public speaking.  It's possible that, for Bucky, talking at school felt like a public address, but talking to the two or three kids immediately surrounding him felt safe.

Small Group leaders often ask, "How big is too big for a small group?"  Here's my answer:  There comes a time in every group when the group is growing numerically and someone who used to speak up and share stops. When that happens, they've gone "Bucky".  It's usually someone who is pretty reserved to begin with, and now as the group has grown, they feel more like they are addressing an audience than talking with friends.  According to George Barna the average American's greatest fear is public speaking.

For me the bottom line is this: when someone in your group goes "Bucky", your group is too big.  This means your group could be three people or 20.  The main thing is to be content with the number God has entrusted to you.

So who's your Bucky?  If no one in your group has gone "Bucky", you don't need to worry.  However, if somone in your group has gone "Bucky", it's time for your group to multiply, but that's a whole other blog post alltogether.

*(The names in this story have been changed to protect the innocent, plus Bucky is waaaay cool name.)

I have to confess a guilty pleasure: I Love "Mr. Deity"!  Don't know what I'm talking about?  It's a cleverly written, online, sit com-like, series of short videos about God, Jesus, Lucifer, and an angel named Larry.  Before you go and watch "Mr. Deity" be warned: it is not written and produced by a Christian and some people might find the humer a bit sacreligious or inappropriate (that's probably why I like it).

Anyway, the reason I mention this today is two-fold.  First, I posted some pretty heavy stuff last week and I needed to laugh today.  Second, I watched these videos with my small group and we used them as a great jumping off place for discussion.  The stuff in these videos is actually pretty thought provoking.

So do I have a point?  Yes.  In your small group it's okay to talk about things that might be considered "off limits" by the religious establishment.  If the people we interract with in the world are talking about these subjects we need to be prepared to do so as well.  Don't hide with your group behind the safety of a church veil.  Step out from behind the curtain and interract honestly and openly with the culture around you!

Now you can enjoy this episode called "Mr. Deity And The Really Big Favor".  You can find plenty more at http://www.mrdeity.com.

All week I've been writing about Passion Week and today is Maundy Thursday, the day when we remember Christ's last day of ministry before he was crucified.

John 13 gives us the account of what we call "The Last Supper" where Jesus spoke these words:  "Let me give you a new command: Love one another. In the same way I loved you, you love one another. This is how everyone will recognize that you are my disciples—when they see the love you have for each other." John 13:34-35 (MSG)  Those words speak right to the heart of small groups.  Do you love each other in your group with such devotion and authenticity that people around you take notice?  Being truly, passionately loved like Kin is something people in our world long for, so when they see it in your group they will be drawn to it like moths to a porch light.  Love Each Other!

On a lighter note...

Theologians have debated for centuries about communion.  Is it of any salvific value?  Do the elements literally turn into the body and blood of Jesus or are they merely symbolic? My communion questions all revolve around the last supper on the night before Jesus was betrayed. Please forgive me in advance if you think I'm sacreligious, but I have a strange mind and I think about wierd stuff!

  >  Did Jesus find it hard to break that little communion wafer into equally sized pieces for all 12 disciples?
  >  Did communion wafers taste stale and dry back then too?
  >  Were any of the Disciples germophobes who didn't want to drink after the other guys?
  >  Were any of the 12 Disciples Baptist?  In other words, did any of them insist that Jesus use Grape Juice instead of wine?
  >  Were Jesus' last words of the night, "Okay, everyone who wants to be in the picture, get on this side of the table?"
  >  Is this what it would have looked like if the Last Supper took place in a galaxy far far away?

 Yeah, I know...I'm a dork!

It's Wednesday of Passion Week, they day that Judas conspired with the Sanhedrin to betray Jesus.  Judas's betrayal was born out of his great weakness: greed.  We villify Judas because of his treacherous act, but how many times have I been guilty of betraying the one I love, the Lord I've chosen to follow because I've given in to my weaknesses?

Today spend some time considering your own life...your daily life.  Have you been coming closer and closer to committing a sin that you will one day regret?  Maybe it's flirting at the office that might lead to an affair.  Perhaps it's thinking about how to "cook the books" so you can come out ahead.  Maybe it's a lie you've been contemplating to cover up a mistake. 

We all have our weaknesses like greed, pride, lust, hate, bitterness, power, spite, materialism and selfishness.

Judas' weakness was money...what's yours?

In Matthew 21:18 and continuing all the way through chapter 24 we read about Jesus' actions on Tuesday of Passion Week!  He started out the morning cursing a fig tree for not bearing fruit (I start most Tuesdays cursing slow drivers in the fast lane), and then he went to the temple to teach.  Boy did he teach!!!

On that Tuesday, he told some of his most memorable parables, outsmarted the pharisees and then that afternoon he explained to his disciples why de cursed the fig tree.  Go ahead, read those chapters today.  And ask yourself why he chose his last Tuesday to say the things he said.

What would you say if this were your final Tuesday?  What would you do?  How might you behave differently than you do on every other average Tuesday?

Live to day like it's the last Tuesday you'll have!

It's Monday of Passion Week, when Jesus threw the money changers out of the temple. Here's an excerpt of that account from the book of Matthew:

Jesus went straight to the Temple and threw out everyone who had set up shop, buying and selling. He kicked over the tables of loan sharks and the stalls of dove merchants. He quoted this text:

   "My house was designated a house of prayer;
   You have made it a hangout for thieves."
Matthew 21:12-14 (MSG)

People often picture Jesus as this quiet peacful dude who passed out healings and hugs, but this event shatters that image.  Jesus was fully PO'd!  Why?  Because he hates sin, especially sin that makes God and His people look hypocritical or crooked.  He was angry that these people had made greed and selfishness a regular part of their "worship".

Bill Hybles describes they way Jesus felt here as "holy discontnet".  What is your "holy discontent"?  What do you see in church, in christians, and in yourself that makes you want to grab a whip and beat someone?  Jesus didn't just get mad, he did something about it.  Get mad about the sin you see surrounding you and the Church then do something about it!  Just don't get arrested for assault. ;-)